Remaining in a place of faith, when the faithless have already abandoned you is the proof of your resolve. To believe the unbelievable in the face of embarrassment and the lack of credibility is the deciding factor.
To outlast, to outrun and to outwit the devil becomes the objective. Holding what you value and what you deem dear, in heart, can be proven in just one way. You must stand in it, stand by it and stand through it.
Your feelings about it have merit, but little value. When your perceptions change, eventually the emotions will follow. Use the desire to respond carnally, as a sign, that growth is still needed and you are still in process.
Everyone wants to quit, this included Christ MY beloved, but HE nevertheless endured and fulfilled HiS calling on Earth. I have empowered you to do the same. I AM asking you to hold on, because greater is coming.
1 Peter 5:8-10
Be sober-minded; be watchful. Your adversary the devil prowls around like a roaring lion, seeking someone to devour. Resist him, firm in your faith, knowing that the same kinds of suffering are being experienced by your brotherhood throughout the world. And after you have suffered a little while, the God of all grace, who has called you to his eternal glory in Christ, will himself restore, confirm, strengthen, and establish you. 11 To him be the dominion forever and ever. Amen.